Winter 2008

They’re mysteries, those pastors.What do they do in their spare time? Do they all live like monks? And how much do they really know about you? In a tell-all glimpse into the secret lives of pastors, Pastor Pulse divulges the truth you’ve been waiting to hear.

It’s hard to be mature.You’re trying to act grown up, but for now you’re in this middle, awkward stage.You’re not a baby,but you’re just not quite an adult yet. So what’s a teenager to do? Start by reading Mr. Pfundstein’s advice on how to act your age.

College is a time of seeking truth and answers. Students want to know what’s right and wrong and why. But Pastor Zill encourages your college years to be a time of seeking Christ, who is truth incarnate, and who can only be found where He has promised to be: in His water,Word, and forgiveness.

To do good works or not do good works . . . that is the question.Or is it? Do we do them to make God happy? Or do we do them in service to our neighbor? And really,what’s going to happen to us if we don’t do any at all?When it comes to good works, Pastor Kuhlmann has the answer.

Sometimes it’s more fun to be naughty than nice. Sure, our parents taught us to be respectful, kind, considerate, and thoughtful.But do we have to be perfect all the time? Can’t we just act up now and then? Pleeeease? Dcs.Thompson knows a thing or two about disobeying parents, and she’s ready to fess up.

Maybe Kathy’s been reading toomuch Twilight or maybe it was a late night out watching it at the movie theater.But either way, she’s got vampires on the brain, and coming into contact with them turns out to bemore than a deadly nightmare.

The elections are over.The political ads are done. The hype has died down. But through it all, families of soldiers are still missing their loved ones and waiting for their return home.You can help. If you know a family of a soldier, Pastor Schey will help you help them.

That’s right.We said it.You’re a baboon.Actually, you’re not.The American Humanist Association said you were, but Pastor Pauls disagrees.You’re not an animal.You’re a child of God.You’re created in His image. So,merry Christmas! You’re not a monkey after all.

Peter is the frustrating disciple.He’s always speaking out of turn, saying what he shouldn’t, making a ruckus, and being obnoxious (and no, we’re not talking about your little brother). But, believe it or not, Pastor Borghardt’s found a time when Peter actually got things right.Check out this article for Peter’s confession of Christ that speaks for us all.

You’ll hear about it from your teachers and college professors, from friends who are Christians, and from the society: it’s not a sin to be gay. But Scripture says differently.To get in on the conversation, read Pastor Andrae’s critique of what the culture tells you is okay about homosexuality.

The Eighth Commandment is easy to break. After all, your grandma’s purple hair is just begging to be made fun of. But it’s a commandment nonetheless. So what happens now? No worries.You have a Friend who never gossips about you, and Pastor Petersen tells you He is anxious to speak good things about you on earth and in heaven.